Constipation.

March 16, 2010

I feel I should apologise for the lack of toilet reviews here over so many months now. I was going to blame it on constipation but I think if I’d been constipated for that long I’d probably be dead by now. In truth I’ve been skint – and therefore visiting few establishments with nice toilets, and I’ve been concentrating my bloggering talents on other ventures, namely:

heronsmakeblogs.wordpress.com

and:

falsemodesty.wordpress.com

Although in fact, my mind hasn’t been completely off the toilet subject. Yesterday I published a blog about the Mooncup, which you can read here. I hope to get back to toilet reviews soon, as I have been recommended so many bogs at this point, but don’t hold yer breath, as I’m very absorbed with clothing porn and baking muffins at the moment, and I will probably be poor for some time, being a Popular Music graduate in a recession with appalling telephone skills.

Thanks for stopping by, I do hope you enjoy my new blogging enterprises.

Thank you!

Nice work lads, I hope none of you had had a liquid lunch that day…

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/22/20090322/thl-oukoe-uk-belgium-toilet-b2e59e8.html

Most toilets flush in E flat.

I read this in one of those Christmas stocking style books of fun facts. By the author’s use of the highly mathematically accurate quantity: ‘most’, i’m guessing this fact didn’t come from an extensive study. It’s fascinating nonetheless.

No I didn’t pee in the Thames… although that might make a good blog. Hmmm…

A very strange thing happened to me in London recently. I happened to glance into the Thames as I was crossing it on a bridge, can’t remember which bridge, and there, a detached loo seat floated right underneath me!

floatingseat

aaaaand a close up:

close up

is this a sign from god?

where did it come from?

what does it mean?

I visited the London Aquarium a couple of years ago and looked at a display they had of strange objects found in the river Thames, including £300 cash in a money clip! unlucky! I don’t remember seeing a toilet seat, although I suppose it isn’t the strangest thing to see floating down a river. I can’t help wondering where it originated? how far it had traveled? I wish it could have told me its story… maybe this could be the subject of a children’s book.

Anyway, that’s the strange toilet related thing that happened to me this week.

Maybe I am some sort of disgusting risk-loving germ hoarder, but I actually sit down on toilet seats. Is this odd? I’m certain it’s not dangerous.. maybe it’s a cultural divide.. or maybe Tyra Banks is just mental.

Just sit down Tyra, I’m sure you do enough squatting in the gym.